10 Weeks

• How far along? 10 weeks, when the rate of miscarriage drops to 3% and the tadpole becomes a fetus. Booya!
• Total weight gain:  +4 overall… that’s better than +6, eh?
• Maternity clothes?   No. But I’m sticking strictly to leggings and yoga pants and have shelved the jeans indefinitely.
• Stretch marks?  No.
• Sleep:  The usual nighttime vom/pee/hot flash festival is in full swing. Come on down!
• Best moment this week:  I went to the gym! Once.
• Miss Anything? Instead of going on about how much I miss my old productive good mommy self, I’ll just say I miss the ability to wash my sorrows away with wine.
• Movement:  No
• Food cravings: I crave the ability to not need food to survive. But I also kind of want cake. (Update: my husband is bringing me cake AS WE SPEAK.)
• Food aversions: My biggest aversion is (of course as a vegetarian) meat, followed closely by oily/greasy foods. And I am really against garlic right now. God.  Is there anything worse than garlic?!
• Gender: 8 weeks to go!
• Labor Signs:  No
• Symptoms:  Yes. All of them.
• Belly Button in or out? In.
• Wedding rings on or off?  On.
• Looking forward to:  Catching up on laundry someday.

This week’s theme is: Rollercoaster of Misery! I’m getting stretches of complete normalcy now – we are talking 3, 4, sometimes 5 (5!) hours from wake-up (as long as I eat something STAT) until about noon. The downside is that when I crash, I CRASH. I’m laid up on the sofa, sticking Luke in front of the tube, thinking about cooking a real dinner, vomiting from thinking about dinner, subsequently not cooking dinner, and choking back the chunks while I prepare yet another sandwich and fruit plate for my soon to be malnourished child as I waste away on nibbles of toast and sips of water.

In other words, my “morning” sickness has condensed itself to half the day AND intensified. What the hell?! The other day, my throws over the bowl were so violent that I actually pulled a back muscle. Yeah. Pulled a muscle. In my back. From the vom.

In better news, my insane body oiliness seems to be chilling out a little, so my hair and skin are appearing SLIGHTLY cleaner and I’m not breaking out like a teenager a la two weeks ago. My gasbaby belly also seems to be a little less like a hot air balloon and a little more like a normal person belly – although I have no idea why because what goes in is NOT coming out. Ay caramba. Onward.